Sunday, September 25, 2022

Current T Test Results: sub jason

The journey that sub jason is on all started on Judgement Day, December 26th 2019. These are his latest testosterone results. 


*note that the lab's test graph range values have changed, so the relative graph (% values) are being used for the most recent comparison of improvement.

The next test will most likely be in December as we get closer to Judgement Day, 2022. 

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #castration, #sub jason, #everclear, #emasculater, #castratrix

After Effects: sub jason; 2 years & 9 months (~1000 days)

 

In sub jason's own words...

Since MsPatty shared my last personal update, there have been few observed changes.  my sensitivity to physical stimulation down below remains low.  In the early morning, when testosterone peaks, my ability to physically stimulate an erection is slightly easier, but nothing to celebrate.  Spontaneous erections from mental arousal alone remains elusive.  An erection, without maintaining physical stimulation, and my mental attention, quickly deflates.  Using a ring at the base sometimes helps maintain it a little, but it's not reliable.  my best erection today remains 1" shorter than it used to be, and always less firm.  i continue to experience difficulties in maintaining a comfortable body temperature, particularly during the overnight.  i have noted an overall reduction in personal energy and motivation for doing physical activities.

During my first visit in December 2015, 6-3/4 years ago, MsPatty confirmed my interest in Fantasy Castration.  Years later, She would reveal that by the end of that visit, She had decided on two goals.  1) She would one day leave Her mark on me, and 2) She would one day lead me to experience the symptoms of castration.  Four years later, She achieved both, and exceed her expectations on the latter.  Her achievement has permanently deprived me of my (formerly) strong libido.  Most of the sexual activities i once enjoyed i can no longer pursue.  MsPatty is not bothered by this significant outcome.  She claims this is Her way of reminding me of 'the male slut i used to be', regardless of my attempts to argue otherwise.  She highlights all of the poor choices i made over the past ~35 years.  Among them, She points to the many partners i had, and my multiple attempts with each, failing to impregnate any of them, even with my rare use of condoms.  MsPatty frequently reminds me She has (so far) allowed me to 'keep Her boys between my thighs', but in a greatly reduced functional state.

Between my thighs, it no longer feels like a strong and stable platform for engaging in sexual activity - it sometimes feels completely absent in the day or so after a release.  The urge to masturbate strikes once, or maybe twice, a week.  It used to occur most mornings and occasionally in the afternoon or evening.  To gain an erection, i have to continually stimulate myself by hand, mentally focusing on staying hard, and on what MsPatty has done there, instead of (previously) trying to enjoy the journey up the orgasmic incline with a random partner (real or fantasy) and ride the euphoric edge as long as possible.  my delivery process now has fewer pulses, each are weaker, and the thinner mixture is quickly exhausted.  It seems to take more energy from me to achieve, and the euphoria from it quickly fades.

Biologically, 3+ days must pass after a previous release before my body replenishes enough fluids for another reasonable discharge.  my output, when waiting less time, is drizzly, or merely a small squirt.  The overall quality, once copious and thick, is a thinner liquid with some thicker globs.  This implies lower overall sperm production, and lacking in other components in the mix.  i was once capable of ~2-3 viable releases a day, but like many of the vivid memories i had from past encounters, both have faded out of reach.  my only attempt at having penetrative sex since MsPatty's modifications was last year.  i attempted entering several times, with my most recent partner, after physically stroking myself to an erection, but quickly became too limp each time.  The last time i had successful sexual intercourse was with them ~5 years ago.  MsPatty has made it harder for me to reach an orgasm, made it less enjoyable once getting there, and made what i produce less viable - if it can ever be delivered on target again.

MsPatty has since graciously offered me a pill which can provide an erection for a short time.  The criteria for its use, and the delay before its effects show, make spontaneous use nearly impossible, and planned use difficult.  First, i must vet any possible partner with MsPatty.  The pill, taken orally, takes about 30 minutes to take effect.  It provides only about 30 minutes of useful stiffness, with no improvement in sensitivity.  i am only to take the pill if i am sure i am going to enter my partner's pussy - i cannot waste it on speculation or other activities.  Soon after, i am required to describe, in detail, the entire encounter to MsPatty.  i know my efforts must also please MsPatty in what i do, or i may not be granted another pill.  This leaves little overall time to just enjoy.  Other factors include 1) i am insecure, not knowing if i can reach a climax from just penetration stimulation - i am convinced a condom would make it all but impossible to feel anything, 2) my partners are relatively vanilla, and an explanation of where my issues come from are hardly pillow talk, and 3) i would have nothing left in my tank if a 'second effort' was called for.  MsPatty, of course, suggests i should, "...not concern myself with my little problems <wicker giggle>, just please your partner."

All of my frustration is directly attributed to low testosterone.  Prior to MsPatty’s modifications, each testicle would have functioned at ~50% (with a 50% reserve).  One fully healthy organ could still provide normal levels of testosterone, sperm, and generation of other related fluids.  From the most recent T-test, my level only improved a few percent closer to the low/normal line.  The function/output of each of 'her boys' is estimated at only 15-20%, with no reserve.  MsPatty has effectively reduced my testosterone level to ~1/3 of a normal male.   Only a very small improvement in T level has been gradually seen over the last 2+ years.  It seems unlikely that i will attain even 1/2 of my former level.  This also assumes MsPatty does not make further modifications.

MsPatty remains thrilled by my ongoing struggle from Her leaving Her eternal mark inside me.  She recently passed along a question from several: Was this something i wanted (permanently)? or expected to happen?  The simple answer is no, it is/was not, but how it transpired is not so clear cut.  i chose to accept certain risks, and there were also added unknowns which i allowed to contribute.  The result has become my unique journey with MsPatty, and i must live with it.  From this, MsPatty happily reminds me of the pride She feels having modified my sexual responses.  From this, She knows She will always control my sexual future.
---
Now for My own words...My balls between sub jason's thighs will be up for My judgement again at the end of the year. Will they remain as they are, or will I finally kill them permanently? Time will only tell. <wicked grin> 

To view all My posts here on LeatherRealm talking about sub jason's journey, go to LeatherRealm: sub jason.

#castratix #castration, #extreme cbt, #Everclear injections, #body modification, #medfet, #banding, #bdsm medical fetish, #medical cbt, #sub jason update

Sunday, September 18, 2022

Sissy Michelle's Return...

 When sissy michelle crossed My doorstep, I knew long before what I would be doing to amuse Myself and to push her further towards our goal. 

After pumping her natural breasts and catharizing her sissy clit, I set up the two 250ml bags of saline with IV tubing and inserted the winged needles into each breast, a couple of inches above each nipple and allowed the saline to begin flowing into each breast. All the while, I used the wide bands that sub jason sent to Me to place 3 of them at specific points down the shaft of her sissy clit to maintain the damage to it, rendering it useless.

Finally, as the saline flowed, I used My Tri-bander to place a castration ring just above the testicles then added an additional wide ring, one of those that sub jason had sent to Me.  Such a lovely shade of purple the balls appeared as they were slowly dying. At 40 minutes after them being banded, I decided to remove the castration ring since I have different plans for them when I do decide to castrate her.  

After both bags of saline had emptied into her, creating a full set of D-cup breasts, she placed them into a lacy black bra and was instructed to dress. Soon she was dismissed, allowed to leave for home. 

Since Saturday, she has been sending updates. The latest, her sissy clit has continued to be totally useless, and she has experienced no libido since then. The update has put a huge smile on My lips. I'm utterly thrilled to hear that she is progressing nicely. 

 In the next 48 hours, keep an eye out on My video gallery below to see what I mean. Videos will be posted. 

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #sissy #sissy tammy, #breast infusion, #breast pumping, #cock banding, #useless cock, #nipple pumping

Monday, September 12, 2022

Sissy Tammy's Latest Breast Infusion...

It's time for another set of tits on Sissy Tammy. Before inserting My needles to fill her breast with saline, I used My breast pump to help allow the saline to flow easier to create a set of beautiful breasts. 

Once the needles were inserted, I infused 250ml of saline into each breast. Now with such perky breasts, I can enjoy her so much more. Can you say breast torture? <wicked giggle> 

Go take a peek on My video gallery below to see what I mean. 

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #sissy #sissy tammy, #breast infusion, #breast pumping

Sunday, September 4, 2022

Sissy Tammy: Everclear Update w/ Measurements

 

Before I began infusing sissy tammy's breast and injecting those bits of flesh between her thighs for a 3rd time, I decided to do an update video and measure them. The video update can be found down below on My Medical Fetish Video Gallery.

Current Measurements:

Left Testicle:

Sept. 3rd: 3.86 cm x 3.40 cm

Right Testicle:

Sept. 3rd: 3.94 cm x 4.11 cm

Sissy Tammy's 3rd set of Everclear injections video can also be found on the video gallery below. Yes! I am in that generous of a mood. 

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #castration, #sissy tammy, #everclear, #sissy, #emasculater, #castratrix

Sunday, August 21, 2022

Current T Level: Sissy Tammy.

  

On June 11th, sissy tammy was injected with Everclear. Ejaculation occurred 4 days later. The next set of Everclear injections was July 30th. Even though she has been injected twice, her testosterone was tested on August 2nd.

The results as of the 2nd shows a normal level. I can't wait to see what the next set of injections does. <wicked grin>

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #castration, #sissy tammy, #everclear, #sissy, #emasculater, #castratrix

Sunday, August 7, 2022

Current Measurements: sub jason.

 

Current measurements of My balls between sub jason's thighs. As you can see from the measurements below that it's been since last December 2021 that I've posted a measurement update. Since Judgement Day 2022 is in roughly 4 months, I will be posting measurements more often. 

Left Testicle:

Dec 2020: 4.0cm x 3.5cm x 2.0cm -> 117.286

Jan 2021: 4.1cm x 3.5cm x 2.0cm -> 120.218

Feb 2021: 4.25cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 129.557

Mar 2021: 4.5cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 137.18 (peak)

Dec 2021: 4.15cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 126.51

*Aug 2022: 4.2cm x 3.3cm x 1.85cm -> 107.405

Right testicle:

Dec 2020: 4.4cm x 3.5cm x 2.4cm -> 141.916

Jan 2021: 4.45cm x 3.55cm x 2.5cm -> 165.431

Feb 2021: 4.45cm x 3.6cm x 2.5cm -> 167.761 (peak)

Mar 2021: 4.5cm x 3.5cm x 2.05cm -> 135.25

Dec 2021: 4.2cm x 3.45cm x 2.05cm -> 124.43

*Aug 2022: 4.3cm x 3.2cm x 2.30cm -> 132.567

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #castration, #sub jason update, #everclear, #testicle banding, #emasculater, #castratrix

Sunday, July 31, 2022

Sissy Tammy...7 wks later.


 It's been 7 weeks since I injected sissy tammy with Everclear. At that time, I injected 1ml into each testicle. Even though there was an initial drop resulting in sissy tammy playing with that bitch between her thighs once and a minimal heal time, I wanted more. After placing a hood over her head, placing a gag between her lips and restraining her securely with her legs high above her, I placed that soon to be useless sissy clit into an external catheter and used the breast pump. 

While the pump worked its magic, I amused Myself a bit with one of My Burdizzos.  Since I had a strong desire to begin giving her some squeezable tits, I removed the breast pump cups and inserted the needles just above the nipples to begin the breast infusion.  

As the saline flowed, I prepared the syringes with Everclear. Unlike last time, I used 31g needles so there would be less if any Everclear escaping from the injection sites. Quickly, I used cohesive tape to restrain then separate the testicles. Using 4 syringes filled with a total of 2ml's of Everclear, I injected 1ml into each testicle through several insertion points. 


As the last of the 250ml bags of saline flowed into the size D cup tits that I had created, I removed the cohesive tape from the now swollen testicles and the catheter bag from the catheter. Quickly, I placed a Pretty Pink Princess diaper on her and left the catheter attached with instructions that she was to remain in both till the next morning. Releasing the restraints, I sat her up and removed the needles from her perky new tits. Soon she left My realm wearing a diaper/catheter and a sexy set of tits to show off for a few hours. 

Within the next 24 hours, I will upload a couple of videos from our time together. It will be worth the wait. <wicked grin>

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #castration, #body modification, #everclear, #breast infusion, #bondage

Sunday, July 10, 2022

Future Plans...Sissy tammy.

 As sissy tammy entered My door, I was excited to examine those bits between her thighs that I had injected with Everclear 3 weeks prior. After restraining her wrists and slipping her feet up into the stirrups, I inserted a catheter to take control over her bladder and connected the breasts pumps to her chest. As the breast pumps were expanding the skin upon her chest, the IV sets were connected to the bags of warm saline and I prepped the lines. Soon the breast pumps were removed and I inserted the winged needles into her chest, just above the nipples and began the infusion. 

The 3-week Everclear injection update was next. While the testicles were for the most part soft which meant that the swelling had passed, there was one firm spot. The response to how long she felt pain/discomfort, she replied that only about 3 days after the injections but the discomfort was manageable. When asked about when the last time she had ejaculated, she replied that the last time that she had the urge to masturbate was 3-4 days later after the injections. After that ejaculation, she hadn't since. Since the testicles are still healing, it may be sometime before her libido urges her to masturbate again. 

After finishing the examination, I amused Myself by fucking her sissy cunt. When both bags of saline were empty, I had created a sexy set of D cup breasts that looked fabulous in the little black bra that she wore. Of course before I released her to go home, I placed a Pink Princess diaper on her and removed the catheter bag from the catheter so that her bladder constantly would drain into the diaper all the way home. Just before she left, she was instructed to wear the diaper with the catheter till later that night when she would be allowed to remove the catheter with a syringe since it was a foley. Can you say extremely wet diaper? <wicked giggles>

Yes, I have videos to share down on My video gallery.

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #castration, #body modification, #everclear, #breast infusion, #bondage

Monday, July 4, 2022

Journey Continues...2 1/2 yrs: sub jason.

 After I restrained sub jason with his legs up in the stirrups with My balls between his thighs totally exposed and his wrists restrained to each side of the bed, I began to examine his groin. The journey that he continues on started December 26th, 2019, with banding the balls between his thighs for an hour and 30 minutes in, injecting each testicle with Everclear. With the banding involved, the Everclear was forced to remain in the testicles for an extended period of time resulting in more damage. Our time began with an update to share. Yes, the update video is down on My video gallery. 

Now it was time to have a bit of fun with those bits between his thighs as well as that almost useless piece of flesh he calls, "mr. penis." The colorful, long candles that he had sent to Me was simply too lovely to ignore so I lubed up the end of one of the purple candles and forced it down into his pisshole. A piece of white cotton rope was tied just under the cock head to keep it erect since "mr penis" can't be depended on anymore then lit the wick. <wicked giggles>

As I looked down upon sub jason's pathetic and almost useless cock, I had a wickedly lovely idea. I knew how to give that limp piece of flesh some girth. With that in mind, I gathered some infusion supplies and began to inject saline into various spots of his foreskin. While I injected saline, expanding the flesh, he squealed from the pressure stretching his sensitive skin. After the saline had been injected, I used a cock pump to force the saline to spread out more evenly which resulted in his limp prick appearing a bit thicker <wicked grin>

Yes, I have video to share down on My video gallery so go take a peek.

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #castration, #body modification, #everclear, #banding, #foreskin infusion, #bondage

Sunday, June 26, 2022

Castration Fantasy into Reality: sub jason.

Inspired by MsPatty's words, ghost written by sub jason.

(Circa Late 2015)

I want you to know I am excited that W/we share an interest in your fantasy of experiencing castration.  From My past experience, each fantasy can and usually does unfold in a different way.  I can already tell this will be an exciting and unique journey.  Therefore, I am confident that one day you will get to experience the effects of castration. <evil chuckle>

----------------------

Over the many visits you will make over the upcoming years, this journey will brush upon several different methods of castration.  During each encounter, I will be picking through your mind, exploring your physical and emotional responses, and gauging your tolerance.  I encourage you to continue to research the various non-surgical methods of castration.  Even if some methods are not realistically possible, tell me about the ones which interest you.  They help Me to understand where your mind is, and where it is going.  I encourage you to begin to write your own fantasy stories, and I will want to read them.

----------------------

As part of the journey, you can expect Me to give you certain activities or restrictions in advance which help Me and help to prepare you.  For example, you will shave your groin area well just before our times together.  During times when we are not meeting, you will inform me about any sexual interactions, or kink activities you may otherwise engage in.  If I have any questions, you will respond with honestly.  You will also not ejaculate for at least a week prior to visiting Me.  In time, you will offer to abstain from releasing even longer for Me.

----------------------

Over the course of these shared experiences, I value your feedback - down to even the minor details.  You will begin tracking your thoughts and activities and keep them as a log.  I will also encourage you to explore and share your childhood memories, and your sexual past, as they tend to pop up and grant me additional insight into your mind.  You will try to explain to Me any connections which you think can be made with your current interests.  When a suitable interval is reached, you will copy them into an e-mail, and send the latest entries to Me.  I love to know the path which has led My balls between your thighs back home to Me.

----------------------

While I do not cater to specific requests unless it interests Me, I will want to know what you are thinking leading up to a visit.  You will keep me updated about any pain or discomfort you feel after a visit.  Don't worry, from time to time you will take home lingering reminders <evil chuckle>.  You will explain what you are feeling & notice, describing any healing time afterward.  You will also provide Me feedback on other shared interests that are explored during these meetings.  

----------------------

(Spring 2016)

In the months after meeting for the first time, you took an interest in the CaCl injections experienced by another.  The goal on that journey was for chemical castration.  This topic is obviously a soft spot in your mind.  I will be pressing on it next time, and many more after that.

----------------------

(Summer 2016)

Nearly all of my castration fantasy interests have heard of, or read about on my blog, a Burdizzo.  Few know how painful the experience is until I have their cords crimped firmly between the jaws of my tool; but you will soon feel its unrelenting grip.  It is around this time that I prefer to establish ownership of My balls between your thighs.  While clamping the spermatic cords to full castration is not for most, partial clamping has an incredible impact.  The pain of this partial (fantasy) clamping helps illuminate how fragile your connection to My balls is.  This pain is quite useful to help Me begin to separate your mind and your sexual identity from My balls.

----------------------

(Fall 2016)

I will continue infusing your scrotum with more saline each time, so you will begin stretching it at regular intervals.  You will obtain one or more items to assist in that effort.  I will encourage you to stretch for longer, more often, along with greater weight for short periods, when leading up to each visit.

----------------------

(Winter 2016-Spring 2017)

You will try to anticipate what may or may not be in store for an upcoming visit.  What I say, and what I write, will be geared toward that next experience, or possibly a later one.  I will skip over some topics you may ask about as they may or may not apply to what I currently have in mind.  In any case, I know it benefits Me for your mind to consider My lack of an answer.  At other times, I will tell you some portion of what is going to happen so your mind gets pulled down the rabbit hole to consider even deeper consequences.  I adore both the long and the subtle mind fuck.

----------------------

(Winter 2017-Spring 2018)

After 2 years, My balls have done well, handling compression, skewering, and electro in stride, although your cords still remember the press of my Burdizzo.  They have also handled infusions of both saline and Everclear.  My balls between your thighs are a hearty pair with fairly high output and good natural resiliency.  Nevertheless, my Everclear infusion dimmed your libido for several months before recovering, and it took you some time to realize it.  This means one of My ball's control points has quietly been identified, and you will come to realize how much I crave that control.  I have much more fun planned for them in other ways, too.  I have not forgotten about your first fantasy story you shared some time ago, either.

---------------------- 

(Spring 2019)

After 3 years of visits, you will become curious about entering extended chastity periods for Me from My posting of this activity with others.  I will encourage it, of course.  Chastity serves Me as you hand over more control.  Chastity also restricts you from playing with My property and carelessly spilling My boys' seed.

----------------------

(Summer 2019)

I was thrilled by your positive reaction to My ball's first banding for 30 minutes.  It also put a great smile on my face when I forced you to ejaculate while banded, and you were thinking it was your last.  I could tell I led your mind smoothly across a very special line as you granted Me full control of your sexual future.  You won't know when, but banding will be a significant part of how I will lead you to experience the effects of castration <wicked giggle>.

---------------------- 

(Fall 2019)

My surprise banding didn't work out as expected, but the knowledge you gained of what almost happened, and what I have planned for next time, is mind-blowing, isn't it?  You are excited about doing better to prepare, to remain banded for the entire duration, and very curious about what the experience entails.  By banding My balls for an hour, I will take away your libido, but you have no idea yet what it will feel like.  You have always been one with your sexual essence since puberty.  Soon you will experience what it was like to be without it.  In the buzz of the moment, you even granted Me an opportunity to inject My balls with something other than inert saline.  Never one to refrain from a challenge, or a good mind fuck, you can try to guess what I have in mind... I can smell My victory already.

----------------------

(December 26, 2019 / The Day Of):

- You arrive hydrated and prepared for the enema you will be given soon after you arrive.

- Once in My space, I restrain you, legs suspended high, and spread, so I have access to My balls.

- My band closes over your scrotum's neck with a snap, and my timer starts.

- My acrylic press forces My balls' excess fluids past the band, lowering internal fluid pressure.

- My electro helps distract you from the passage of time.

- I inject each of My balls with 2cc of Everclear at 30 minutes.  They will remember me forever.

- As the pain from the band escalates, I keep you distracted until the timer is up.

- I cut My band after 1hr, your body shudders, and My panties are wet.  

- I smile knowing that I have left My mark inside My balls, and your sexual future forever changed.

--------------------------

(Soon After And The Next Morning)

The one-hour banding experience by itself is intense.  You wonder for a bit what has actually occurred.  A few details will eventually become clear:

- Both of My balls, deprived of oxygenated blood for an extended period, are in shock, and have shut down.

- Sperm maturation and testosterone production, a cycle which extends over ~64-72 days, has been aborted.

- Just like a castrated male, testosterone is no longer entering your bloodstream from its primary source.

- You have already forgotten about the 3+ month chastity edge you walked in with.

- Just like a castrated male, your blood testosterone level declines, soon reaching a negligible level.

- For the night ahead, I enjoy filling your scrotum full with saline, and playing with it, and your mind.

- The next morning, I force you to ejaculate a little thick sludge - all that remains in you.  Despite an intense effort on your part to emit it, this is only a hint of the struggle which is to come.

You will next encounter the symptoms of testosterone loss.  You will send Me updates on everything you experience.  

--------------------------

(The Next Few Days)

After experiencing your first day of your fantasy castration journey, these symptoms are right around the corner:

- Both of My balls inside that scrotum will swell unnaturally to 2-3 times their normal size as your body rushes nearby fluids to address their internal damage.

- As in times past, your significantly infused scrotum will take several days to dissipate.

- The pain and swelling you feel in your cords and groin area from the banding and ejaculating while everything was greatly inflamed will linger for about a week, and then begin to subside.

- Your ability to experience spontaneous erections has already faded, and generating them from manual stimulation is already in decline.

- Lacking testosterone, your body will produce less secondary sexual resources (i.e., ejaculate fluids), and what ejaculate you produce will thin out from a lack of newly matured sperm.

- You will soon find it difficult to reach and control a climax/release, despite a reoccurring itch to experience it more often.

You are now experiencing what a male encounters soon after his testicles are removed (castration).

--------------------------

As My balls' swelling subsides over the next ~2 weeks, you will begin to notice some additional effects.  They are all likely to linger for quite awhile:

- My nuts will atrophy, becoming firm and bumpy, shrinking to less than 1/2 of their normal size.

- you will feel like something is missing - your groin area will feel like a void, and the area will frequently feel damp.

- your cock will noticeably retract/shrink, and its sensitivity will diminish to that of normal skin.

- Your interest in the opposite sex will fade away.

- Any weak erection you can produce will take focused manual effort, and be difficult to maintain.

- Any releases you achieve will have chronically low fluid output, requiring many days in between attempts to emit more than dribbles.

- You will begin to feel the common effects of hormonal menopause, just like a woman would:

-> random hot/cold flashes

-> night sweats

-> difficulty managing a comfortable body temperature

You will notice that strong physical activity may bring about menopausal symptoms more frequently.  Over an extended time, your body will acclimate to any hormonal changes.

You will continue updating Me with what you are experiencing and thinking.  You will confirm each of these symptoms as you encounter them.

---------------------------

(Spring 2020)

you begin to notice some small amount of recovery, offering a glimmer of hope.  The still-viable areas in each of My nuts have restarted their normal processes.  However, My nuts are much smaller now, and their functional output greatly reduced.  You have entered the next phase of recovery.  I will encourage you to be patient.  This recovery will be slow since I injected Everclear, and will seem to go on for a long time.

---------------------------

(Summer 2020)

you begin feeling as if your healing has slowed.  Also, your frustration with being sexually impotent is growing.  I remind you that it does not concern me at all that you struggle at being limp and unable to sexually perform.  In fact, I find it quite amusing.  My nuts no longer function for you as they once did, and instead, they function only for My pleasure.  you will begin to think that those natural sexual activities you once desired and pursued will no longer be achievable.  

---------------------------

(Fall 2020)

A full testosterone test result reveals your level remains quite a bit below normal.  I will remind you to think about all that testosterone My nuts between your thighs once produced; the strength it used to give your now dysfunctional cock; the firm anchor of pride which once warmed your loins; it was undeniably what led you, and My boys, to Me, all those years ago.  Isn't it amazing how My balls testosterone influences you, for good or bad? <wicked giggle>

---------------------------

(Winter-Spring 2021)

Knowing that you continue to struggle every day with the effects of low testosterone brings a smile to my face.  While you are not technically castrated, My nuts between your thighs now function differently, and only for Me.  I am constantly thrilled that I have significantly changed your sexual future by taking control.  you will have difficulty accepting this.  The effect I have had on my nuts, and thereby you, cannot be denied.  You will eventually accept that you are borrowing the use of My nuts between your thighs.  It will be determined on a year to year basis whether you may continue using them.

---------------------------

(2022 & Onward)

For the foreseeable future, you can look forward to both incremental improvements and undeniable realities:

- Your body will continue to rebuild My nuts, but they have suffered permanent internal damage, so their output will never be equal to what you once knew.

- Your testosterone level will remain below normal for some time.  It will eventually rise, in small amounts, over an extended period, but the strong libido you once had is unlikely to return.

- Many of your past sexual memories will begin to fade as your mind gets used to much less testosterone, and those memories no longer trigger.

- Orgasms will never be as rewarding, or carry the extended euphoric rewards, as you once knew.

- Having been quite proud of your former 6" penis, then experienced its atrophy and ongoing erectile dysfunction, you will continually struggle to regain your sexual confidence.

- If you ever again succeed at penetrative sex with another woman, it will seem more of a chore, and less of a reward, than you have always remembered.

Each yearly anniversary I will revisit my lease for you to use My boys.  The question will always be: Will I take them this time?  Craving their past experiences, My boys will drive you to play My game, and you will not hesitate to follow.  The first few times will seem to be left to chance; with all the various castration methods possibly being next.  I know that keeping them will be a double-sided tease, leaving you to suffer with low testosterone for another year, but maybe you can eventually get hard for a little while from a little pill?  At any point I may again band My boys; possibly, taking away what's left of your libido for several months? Or maybe longer?  The question will always be there: Will My boys wake up again? Can your weak libido return?  Then if it returns, how many times do My boys have left at the edge? <evil giggle>

---------------------------

I will remind you often that I like to regularly relive every detail of this journey.  Each time I do, I quickly get wet and easily gush with an intense orgasm.  I know you will be continually reminded of your experience, and what has changed, many times each and every day.  you will be unable to deny that I have turned your castration fantasy experience into your reality.  <evil chuckle> 

Thursday, June 16, 2022

Sissy Tammy Returns....

 My update post about sissy tammy's latest visit which was supposed to be posted Tuesday but due to not having electricity which involved most of central Ohio from early Tuesday till today, Thursday, it's up late. It's worth the wait though as you can see. 


Even though I didn't band those bits of flesh between sissy tammy's thighs, I did inject 1ml of 190 proof Everclear into each testicle. Will there be a heal time longer than a week? Of course, there will be, but the bigger question is how much permanent damage will there be? <wicked grin>

I began our time together by restraining her then inserting a 16fr catheter down her urethra so to take control over her bladder. Then I began lubing up My huge cock and working it into her tight sissy cunt. 

Soon, My desire shifted to those balls between her thighs. After injecting each testicle multiple times, My focus went back to fucking that sissy cunt and smacking those Everclear filled balls as well as her ass for awhile. <wicked giggle>

Yes, I have video to share down on My video gallery so go take a peek.

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #sissy, #castration, #body modification, #everclear, #anal slut, #spanking

Monday, June 6, 2022

Sissy Lexa Returns...

 

 When sissy lexa walked thru My door, I knew exactly what I desired from her. With such lovely long hair, breasts would be the perfect addition, so I created a set of breasts by infusing 250ml of saline into each breast. 

The breasts that I created was roughly a D cup and ended up lasting till the next morning. Clearly, she hydrated well before and after the infusion. 

To finish our time together, I restrained her wrists and her legs spread wide above her. Then I placed a vice on those bits of flesh between her thighs and allowed her to experience her first testicle skewering. <wicked grin>

Yes, I have video to share down on My video gallery so go take a peek.

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #breast infusion, #sissy, #testicle skewering, #body modification, #bdsm corset

Sunday, May 29, 2022

The Nurse is in... with sissy slut terry.

 When My patient, sissy slut terry entered My office, I soon began to strap him down and spread his legs wide to insert My speculum into his sissy cunt. After that cunt was ready to begin, I used a cylinder with pump to create a prolapse. 

After violating his sissy cunt for a while, I placed those balls between his thighs in a vice to stretch them up high and totally exposed them. Soon, I began burning those exposed balls with a cigarette and using smaller vice clamps to crush the balls before I finally began inserting 4-inch needles thru them. 

To finish My examination, I created a temp needle corset down his back and a branded My initials on his shoulder. Not permanently but My mark will be on his flesh for a while. <wicked giggle>

Yes, I have video to share down on My video gallery so go take a peek.

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #needle insertion, #sissy, #humiliation, #body modification, #branding

Sunday, May 22, 2022

After Effects: sub jason, 2 yr & 5 month questionnaire update ...

In sub jason's own words:

After Effects: sub jason, 2 year and 5 months update ...

From two years ago (@ 5-months), sub jason filled out this form with some points of castration experiences made by others.  his answers then, and now, appear side-by-side:

For the first month or so:

    You may not physically feel any different, although the internal feeling that something is missing slowly creeps in.

 5Mos: Generally true, but the first 2 weeks was masked mostly by organ swelling and regional pain.

 1yr5mos: i feel sexually inadequate between my thighs.  

 Now: i long for that strong feeling between my thighs to return, but it's merely a echo of a memory.

    You will gradually lose your sex drive.

 5Mos: i had little to none soon after until about 3+ months later. While some has returned, it's still currently low.

 1yr5mos: The interest has returned.  The ability to perform has not.

 Now: The interest is in my mind but being unable to physically respond is a constant frustration.

    Emotionally, you tend to want to masturbate more and more, while it is still possible.

 5Mos: This was true, but i held myself to about twice a week for release measurement purposes. The urge to know if they were still working was the prominent interest.

 1yr5mos: After any release, the desire/interest to do so disappears for at least 2-3 days.

 Now: While a release after much of a week of abstaining generates some reasonable fluid output (one to two mostly liquid pulses), it is very short in euphoric reward.  Another release sooner is dribbling and unrewarding.

Past a few weeks to a month:

You will have random hot flashes and night sweats, and they may continue for weeks, months, or more.

 5Mos: True, and they continued with slightly less intensity past 3 months, but rare now at 5 months.

 1yr5mos: i still feel the occasional random hot flash, and with hotter evenings or more physical activity being the potential trigger.

 Now: They are not as frequent as a year ago, but still random, yet tied to physical activity when they do occur.

    Your penis will slowly shrink and atrophy.

 5Mos: It lost ~20% of it's former erect length, unknown girth loss (erect) in the initial weeks. It has regained about half of what length was lost.

 1yr5mos: i have not regained any additional capacity, and achieving that firmness remains an effort.  Where i used to feel it when erections were happening, i now only seem to notice when a semi-erection is retracting.

 Now: Only a very minor change noticed since last year.  On some mornings, the hint of a little more thickness sometimes appears, but it is barely noticeable.

    Your penis will lose sensitivity, with physical contact becoming more like any other part of your skin.

 5Mos: True. It has since regained some sensitivity after 3+ months, but not back to what it was.

 1yr5mos: The sensitivity level is about the same as it was a year ago and affects my ability to become and stay aroused.

 Now: i remain about the same as a year ago, with the ongoing erectile dysfunction / lack of sensitivity / inability to remain erect.

    As your testicles atrophy, you will lose most of the sexual feelings once centered in your groin region.

 5Mos: It had produced a void feeling in the region soon after, for several weeks, which dissipated to neutral and a slight recovery after some hormone production rebounded near 3+ months.

 1yr5mos: Some additional feeling has returned, along with interest, but it has not translated into much additional functionality.

 Now: The drive, or strength, that once emanated from my groin remains absent, with no notable improvement in the past year.

    Your testicles will lose mass, and your scrotum will shrink.

 5Mos: They lost ~50% in volume and have only recently regained a small of that amount back.

 1yr5mos: Although volume measurements indicate to a return to low-normal human size, visually they are only about 2/3 their former size.

 Now: Measurements have stopped as their relative size remains about constant to what was about a year ago.  

    Erections will become less firm, then weak, until they become impossible to achieve.

 5Mos: Erections became difficult with physical stimulation, impossible to achieve by mental efforts, and only recently improved a little approaching 4-5 months.

 1yr5mos: i remain unable to gain and maintain any erection without physical stimulation, and it's quality remains reduced.

 Now: Other than the minor thickening noted on some mornings, nothing else has improved with my erection without the use of an enhancement pill

    M/F sexual dysphoria will be reduced.

Not an issue before, 5Mos, 1yr5mos, or now.

    M/Eunuch sexual dysphoria will be reduced.

Not an issue before, 5Mos, 1yr5mos, or now.

    You may experience more emotional episodes.

Not an issue before, 5Mos, 1yr5mos, or now.

Longer Term: COVID isolation protocol has made some of this difficult to directly attribute.

    You may lose upper body muscle and strength.

 Not seen yet.

    You will likely gain abdominal fat.

 No change in weight @ 2+ months, but heavier at 5 months and more so a year later due to world events (COVID) and reduced physical of activity.  i remain heavier, and find it difficult much of the time to motivate to get the extra exercise needed to take it off.

    You will stop looking at women within a sexual context.

 5Mos: This was true particularly during the 1–2-month period. Due to a lack of being able to sexually perform, there is reduced interest.

 1yr5mos: The interest has returned, but my perceived inability to perform deters me from pursuing.

 Now: What was once a natural activity to engage and potentially explore is no longer natural in execution, with my sexual failure (if events were to get that far) all but certain.

    Mustache and bear growth reduces dramatically

 Not seen yet.

    Body hair softens, thins, or disappears.

 Did not occur, although slowing of baldness process may have happened.

    You will feel as if you are asexual.

 Did not occur.

    Female breasts may develop over a period of a couple of years.

 Did not occur.

-------------------------

i filled out MsPatty's First Contact questionnaire over 6 years ago. i listed an interest in castration fantasy, which MsPatty was quite pleased to learn. 

Over the course of the next 4 years, that fantasy was explored in different ways, with attempts at incurring deeper effects interspersed over many visits.  

i hinted during the Fall lead up conversations to December 26, 2019, that maybe the Everclear from two years prior might play a part, and MsPatty carpe diem.  

i experienced the loss of all testosterone production as a result of the hour banding, and the effects of castration, as She planned.  The effects the Everclear, used together with the banding, have since proven to have a devastating long term effect.  

As a result, MsPatty remains thrilled that i continue to struggle with low testosterone, and the frustration of sexual inadequacy.  Although there has been small gains in most every quarterly testosterone tests since, it is obvious approaching 2.5 years later that my castration fantasy became much closer to reality.  

i am not technically castrated, as i can, with focused effort or a pill, get hard, and be driven to release semen.  It remains possible now only at much longer than common intervals.  There is less enjoyment for the effort involved, and my chances of successfully engaging another woman in typical sexual intercourse are extremely remote.

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #Everclear, #emasculator, #burdizzo, #castration, #body modification, #banding