Current Measurements: sub jason

 

Left Testicle:

Dec 2020: 4.0cm x 3.5cm x 2.0cm -> 117.286 (1yr)

Jan 2021: 4.1cm x 3.5cm x 2.0cm -> 120.218

Feb 2021: 4.25cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 129.557

Mar 2021: 4.5cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 137.18

Dec 2021: 4.15cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 126.51 (2yr)

Aug 2022: 4.2cm x 3.3cm x 1.85cm -> 107.405

Sep 2022: 4.3cm x 3.4cm x 2.2cm -> 134.728

Dec 2022: 4.38cm x 3.37cm x 2.4cm -> 148.39 (3yr)

Mar 2023: 4.33cm x 3.36cm x 2.44cm -> 148.70

Feb 2024: 4.30cm x 3.21cm x 2.38cm -> 137.61 (4yr, 1.5mo)

Right Testicle:

Dec 2020: 4.4cm x 3.5cm x 2.4cm -> 141.916 (1yr)

Jan 2021: 4.45cm x 3.55cm x 2.5cm -> 165.431

Feb 2021: 4.45cm x 3.6cm x 2.5cm -> 167.761 (peak)

Mar 2021: 4.5cm x 3.5cm x 2.05cm -> 135.25

Dec 2021: 4.2cm x 3.45cm x 2.05cm -> 124.43 (2yr)

Aug 2022: 4.3cm x 3.2cm x 2.30cm -> 132.567

Sep 2022: 4.35cm x 3.25cm x 2.2cm -> 130.281

Dec 2022: 4.28cm x 3.17cm x 2.37cm -> 134.691 (3yr)

Mar 2023: 4.29cm x 3.15cm x 2.34cm -> 132.456

Feb 2024: 4.2cm x 3.14cm x 2.2cm -> 121.53 (4yr, 1.5mo)*

* sub jason also reports the right cord continues to have an occasional ache from JD 2022's Burdizzo clamping.

#sub jason update, #blonde bbw #extreme cbt, #everclear injection #banding, #tri-bander

After Effects: sub jason 4 year Summary

In sub jason's own words...

sub jason's 4yr Summary

MsPatty has again requested a summary update for the 4th anniversary of Her Judgement Day (JD).

On the evening of December 26, 2019, MsPatty had her way between my thighs during an hour-long banding. During the initial 30 minutes of being banded, she pressed everything flat with an acrylic vice.  For the second 30 minutes, She introduced 3cc of Everclear split between both testicles, biased toward the right.  Her primary goal was to temporarily induce the symptoms of castration.  She knew the banding would likely cause an abrupt loss of testosterone production.  This would in turn result in loss of libido, loss of erections, and essentially all reproductive output, for somewhere around 2-3 months.  With the addition of the Everclear, She was secretly hoping for some additional libido dimming/damage to occur which would result in a longer heal time, and/or possibly a slight reduction in my already high testosterone level.

The results were, in Her opinion, much greater than She expected.  Instead of something temporary, there has been a permanent and significant loss in sexual function, which has thrilled MsPatty to no end.  my testosterone level crashed, as expected, and now only hovers around the clinically low-normal line.  It was a loss of ~2/3 of the level i once knew.  my libido is now barely noticeable.  i am unable to get mentally triggered erections, and constant physical stimulation is required to maintain what am able to achieve, which has also lost length and girth.  Both testicles are smaller now.  my ejaculate quantity is lower.  The mixture is generally more liquid, plus my recovery period is several days, not hours.  Having natural sex (I.e. w/o erection enhancement drugs or rings) is no longer possible.  

———

This past year has marked a shift in MsPatty’s ongoing efforts.  She has been more active in Her efforts to cause short-term, and potentially long-term, impact in what remains of my libido.  During the last JD, She clamped the cord to the right testicle with Her Burdizzo.  Although it appears to remain somewhat viable, there has been an ache in it's cord this entire year.  This experience has left a convincing reminder that She can take Her property between my thighs whenever She wants.

MsPatty has also been working ’her boys’ over the past year, physically crushing and extending them in Her hands.  Her fingers probe deeply, and frequently compress their plumbing.  The most recent visit had a return to applying the thick colored bands, achieving the placement of 7 of them, again compressing the plumbing, and cutting blood flow for a short, but not insignificant period of time.

After each of this years’ visits, the return of my limited libido has taken a little longer.  i have also experienced more frequent hot flashes.  i have again been having greater difficulty in remaining temperature-comfortable when going to bed, particularly as the nights have grown colder.  A recent head cold that likely had a mild fever left me soaked under the covers more than a few times - something which hasn't happened in recent memory.  As noted before, physical activity also tends to also bring hot flashes, along with a tendency to get tired sooner.  As the weather turned cold in recent weeks, and i was working outside, i could also feel my penis retracting deeply inward at times, like a negative sexual response.  It's certainly been an additional negative confidence booster.

MsPatty also remains focused on achieving her ‘Stolen Orgasm’. She hopes to perfect the process soon.  She wants to be able to extract the stored ejaculate which has been held due to chastity, all without achieving or enjoying climax.  Removing 'the load' without achieving climax leaves much of the hormonal edge, but removes a key component of enjoying a release, and as Her theory goes, prevents 'accidents'.

At this point, nearly all of my releases since the summer have been required to be ruined.  That has meant they must be blocked, or extracted while a tube is deeply inserted with a syringe vacuum applied, which has been uncomfortable.  The number of natural releases i have been permitted this year is approximately 10, with most of them occurring much earlier in the year.   Since September, i have only been permitted a ruined release about every 2 weeks. The total count this year is barely past 30, and there are of course only 52 weeks in a year.

After Effects: sub jason 3.5yr Summary

 

In sub jason's own words...

MsPatty has again requested a summary update of my journey with Her.  As far as functional improvements, very little has changed between my thighs.  my T-test results technically crossed the clinical low-normal line over the winter of 2023.  In the greater picture, my overall testosterone level still remains ~1/3 of what it was prior to MsPatty's modifications in December 2019.  i still experience random hot flashes.  my energy level (libido) to pursue the opposite sex remains low.  What has recently changed for me is my realization of how many of MsPatty's powerful desires are behind this journey.  During the first 4 years, i envisioned my high libido, and MsPatty's will, competed in many rounds of strength and endurance.  Then, during <December 2019's epic engagement>, She effortlessly decimated my libido in an hour.  The last ~3.5 years has effectively been MsPatty toying with what survived, me struggling with the reality of what transpired, and Her waiting patiently to administer the coup de grace.

After the first meeting in December 2015, MsPatty decided She would one day lead me to experience my fantasy of castration.  During the Summer of 2016 visit, She used Her <Burdizzo on both cords> to begin that process.  This allowed Her to demonstrate how fragile a connection they had to me.  She also declared that she was taking ownership of Her testicles.  Via regular physical and psychological strikes, She gradually separated them from the sexual image which i held of myself.  Even while this transpired, Her next desire soon emerged.  She sought to slowly diminish (damage) the function of one of Her nuts between my thighs.  She focused greater physical attention on the slightly smaller right orb, and/or its cord.  Any time i raised a concern, She pointed out that the other one would still try to make up for it...  December 2019's activities would also impose a greater effect upon it's function and size.  During Her recent Judgement Day 2022, MsPatty again targeted her 'little boy', <clamping his cord> for ~5 minutes.  While it appears to have survived Her latest efforts, i continue to feel the cord's ache ~6 months later.  Knowing that MsPatty is always pushing, Her continued pursuit is expected to cause it further functional decline. 

During November 2019, MsPatty decided to surprise me.  In what should have been my 'fantasy castration experience', She attempted to band Her nuts for an hour, but i was unable to last past 30 minutes.  To make up for this, i quickly promised to last the full hour (in December).  But MsPatty always wants more.  She now desired for me to experience an extended period of healing.  She wanted the expected 2-3 months of castration-like symptoms to linger for a bit longer.  She introduced Her acrylic ball press and added Everclear injections to realize this greater result, also increasing the risk for permanent damage.  As She spoke of in <July 2020>, MsPatty more than met and exceeded Her expectations in December 2019.  She feels no remorse at the result.  She took full control of 'Her boys' between my thighs that night.  From this point forward, my ability to engage in and enjoy sexual activities abruptly declined.  Sexual intimacy (i.e. - intercourse) with a woman will never be the same for me.  my efforts to get erect and effect a release is now high, with low a reward.

In the meantime, MsPatty continues to manipulate what little remains of my libido.  For now, i am still permitted to try to engage in sexual intercourse with a willing woman.  However, Her little pill is my only option to reliably get hard for a little while.  It is my only hope to penetrate, while i must still navigate all the complications of intimacy it now entails.  In my only other attempt to get laid ~2 years ago, without a pill, i failed to enter my partner.  Because i must use Her property (Her boys) and Her pill, i am required to notify MsPatty about any opportunity to have sex, and report on what transpired soon after.  Almost six years have now passed since i was last sexually intimate with a woman.

Soon after my first visit Her, MsPatty deemed me to be a chronic masturbator.  In the ~4 years which followed, She gradually reduced my frequency of self-indulgent releases from an average of ~12-14 times/week, to ~1/week.  More recently, that average has fallen further, now with only 22 releases in the first half / ~26 weeks of 2023.  Always desiring more control, MsPatty now requires me to seek Her permission before releasing at all times.  She has warned She will grant it less frequently than before.  Also, when i am permitted to self-release, i am not permitted to enjoy them anymore.  i.e. it must be blocked/ruined.  What i used to enjoy no longer brings me pleasure, and instead my frustration from it brings pleasure to MsPatty.

i know my ongoing struggle with the effects of low testosterone continues to thrill MsPatty.  At the same time, i had never expected to be permanently modified or castrated.  i have slowly come to terms with Her permanent modifications.  This includes the erectile dysfunction and my loss of sexual confidence.  Despite the last three Judgement Days each granting me another year of use of 'Her boys', my mind has clung to the notion that this has all been part of my fantasy castration experience.  Only in the past month have i come to realize one more of MsPatty's deepest desires.  Her desire has been to turn my castration fantasy into my reality.  She knows that, while She plays hard with Her modified 'boys', one day it will be too much.  Once they fail, Her desire will be fulfilled.  

In the meantime, MsPatty calls Her boys home to visit Her every few months, and i must bring them.  MsPatty fully controls what remains of my sex.

After Effects: sub jason 6 Week Summary

sub jason 6 Week Summary

This is from 6 weeks after Judgment Day 2022.  What follows is a summary, in sub jason’s own words, of those events, and the after effects…so far.

Judgement Day 2022 began in the late afternoon of 12/31.  i spent the initial hours being locked in MsPatty’s cage.  In the early evening, after MsPatty decided it was time, i was let out, and received an enema.  i was then restrained on the bed, with my legs spread and ankles high, and the hood & blindfold took away my vision.  MsPatty began Her Judgment Day games with Her Tri-bander.  She applied a stacked series of 4 thick bands and left them on for 25 minutes.  She also used her acrylic press during the banding time.  The stacked bands eventually began to hurt similar to what i remember towards the end of the hour of the single golden band from ~3 years prior until She cut them off.  i know, after a short rest, MsPatty amused Herself in various other ways over the next several hours.  Much of what followed i am missing / short on details, because of Her Judgement at the end.  Because of the posted video, i know MsPatty used the pillory w/the leather slapper. She also did ball punching, and 'stretch & shout'.  i don't recall much detail from that period.

As it became late in the evening, MsPatty applied Her Burdizzo as Judgement to my right cord for ~10 minutes.  She had decided She was again going after the smaller/weaker testicle in my scrotum.  This ‘little boy’ of Hers has been Her ongoing focus since as far back as the second and third visits back in 2016, and also on December 2019, when it received a greater amount of MsPatty’s Everclear injection.  After the clamping ended, i spent the next hour or so shaking, and being held by Her.  my mind was in disbelief of what Her and Her Burdizzo had done, but my body knew something had happened.  MsPatty eventually directed me back into the cage, with a Texas catheter and bag, to try to sleep until morning.  The symptoms from Her Judgement Day 2022 began to show up during the overnight in the cage.

Between the multiple stacked bands and the clamping, both of ‘Her boys’ began to swell up, and became very firm.  The right cord became quite swollen and remained so for over 2 weeks.  The smaller right testicle swelled up even larger than the left for at least the next 3+ weeks.  It has since returned to be slightly smaller, as it was before.  At 6 weeks, both testicles have slowly returned to an approximate size of their Fall 2022 dimensions.  Both are still more firm than they used to be.  The right has varying amounts of tenderness at times, although more diminished in the past week or so.  The right cord has had an ache since Judgement Day, although slowly diminishing over the period.  It is a general ache which is noticeable during certain movements.

MsPatty has required me to report and collect my releases, and provide video or pictures of the output result, to gauge the effects of Her Judgement Day 2022.  i have reported that the urge to achieve a release, since December, is less frequent.  my average before Judgment Day was ~5 days between releases.  It has since become ~7 days between releases.  my fluid output for each release has also fallen.  Compared to the pass three years, i would now classify it as very poor.  Although the output seems thicker, i no can longer produce enough liquid content to truly ‘shoot’ anything.  Instead, it amounts to little more than a blob, or a few dribbles, even with the further extended recharge period.  It has become harder to get and stay erect with physical stimulation.  i am sometimes not fully hard when i achieve release.  i feel a twinge in the right cord as the muscle contracts while approaching the release trigger point.

It seems that MsPatty has further affected the functionality of Her boys between my thighs.  my already low libido has certainly taken another hit.  i felt a few hot flashes driving home, and over several days which followed, although none recently.  mr penis remains more retracted most of the time.  After the events of December 2019, i had expected, then had declining hope for, a reasonable recovery, most of which has never happened.  The very slow improvement progress i had seen through last summer has easily been dealt another setback.  MsPatty has not been encouraging any hope of recovery to my pre-Judgement Day 2022 level like she been had back in early 2020.  i am now thinking that additional permanent damage has transpired, and MsPatty's comments are in general agreement, but She is patient to let time pass and see the long-term results.  Of course, MsPatty also remains amused at my decline in interest/frequency to edge, to achieve a release, and the further decline in my reproductive fluid output.

----------------------------------------------------

Soon sub jason will be bringing My balls between his thighs back to Me. At that time, I will be sending his blood sample off to the lab to test his current testosterone level. When those results are in, then we will know what impact that Judgment Day 2022 had. 

Rewind Time...sub jason

Before the Burdizzo, there was the Tri-bander. As sub jason lay completely helpless with legs spread wide, I began to apply bands one after another till, I reached 4. 

With the 4 bands overlapping one another, the pressure was on for sub jason till I decided to use My scalpel. This time, I removed the bands after 25 minutes. Such a lovely shade of grape purple. <wicked grin> 

During those 25 minutes as My balls between his thighs slowly turned cold, I decided that I wanted to see them under clear acrylic. Pressed meat anyone? LOL

 And yes, there is video so go take a look below on My video gallery.

 Latest Update:

January - June 2023 Online Schedule

Medical Fetish Video Gallery

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2011 - 2018

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2006 - 2010

LeatherRealm: Photo Gallery 

#extreme cbt, #body modification, #medfet, #banding, #bdsm medical fetish, #medical cbt, #sub jason update, #castration, #tribander, #testicle banding

The MsPatty Effect

 

As you can see, I've had an effect on sub jason's releases as well as his testosterone for a few years now. 

Thanks goes to sub jason for the graph. 

I will be posting the results from the testosterone test that was taken on December 26th, just prior to Judgment Day 2022 on the weekly update.

Facing Judgment Day...sub jason.

On Saturday, December 31st, 2022, sub jason faced My judgment, his judgment day. In the afternoon, he arrived as instructed and soon after was locked into My cage for a couple of hours till I was ready to begin. The hours in the cage also allowed his anticipation to grow. 

After allowing him to stew in My cage, I released him and ordered him onto the bed to administer enemas in preparation for the night which took a while. Once he was clean as a whistle, I introduced him to a couple of "games." The Stretch & Shout game is a person favorite involving My balls between his thighs tied to one end of the bed and My cleavage at the other end. The goal was for him to reach My large breast without using his hands. The only way to achieve this is to stretch My balls. <wicked grin> 

After enjoying him for a while, it was time for him to face the verdict. The verdict, I used the burdizzo to clamp the smaller/weaker testicle. In the coming weeks, we will know whether or not the clamping was a success. The remaining testicle, I have allowed him to use for another year.

 Go to My video gallery below to watch as I pass judgment. 

 Latest Update:

January - June 2023 Online Schedule

Medical Fetish Video Gallery

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2011 - 2018

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2006 - 2010

LeatherRealm: Photo Gallery 

#blonde bbw, #extreme cbt, #Everclear injections, #body modification, #medfet, #banding, #bdsm medical fetish, #medical cbt, #sub jason update, #castration, #tribander, #testicle banding, #judgment day, #burdizzo 

Latest Libido Questionnaire: sub jason.

This is the latest libido questionnaire that sub jason has filled out prior to Judgment Day 2022. This should give you an idea of his current situation, libido wise. 

------------

You are receiving this questionnaire to help Me understand your current libido/sex drive, and/or possibly any change in it you may have experienced in our journey together.  I may have attached this to a correspondence with additional guidance or context, so I need you to follow that.  If not, your answers should generally apply to the past few weeks unless otherwise noted.

If some question numbers are missing, they may have not applied to our shared interests/experiences/journey, and I have omitted them.  Some questions may be based upon physiological responses (or lack thereof) which you are not experiencing and may not have an answer at this time.

The familiar name I know you by (sub/sissy/bttm)_sub jason.

Make note of the day/month/year when you are filling this out here: 12/12/2022.

About how long ago was the experience which brought about observable changes in your libido?

1082_ days/weeks/months/years (Hint: Google can help, if you ask Her correctly)

Now save the questionnaire before you continue, replacing 'male' with your familiar name, and replace mm and yy with the current month and year.

1. Prior to this experience, would you have considered your male libido to have been 1) below normal, 2) average, 3) strong? (3)

2. Please respond to sub-questions a-f from the actual experience.  If this is a repeat questionnaire, copy in your past answers:

a) Did My testicle(s) swell as part of the experience?  Yes

b) Did either/both of My testicles remain elevated/pulled up close to your torso for an extended period of time afterward?  Yes

c) If either 1 or 2, for approximately how long before one/both returned to normal size/extension? (explain) ~2 weeks

d) Did you notice if your cord(s) had any bumps, sensitivity, or thickness changes?  Yes, both, thicker and more sensitive

e) If 1, 2, or 4 was answered Yes, have either/any caused you any abdominal discomfort? Not since the experience.

f) Within the context of the above questions, do you have anything else to include? The immediate symptoms from the experience have given way to long-term permanent changes.  i am sexually dysfunctional.

3. Compared to before the experience, would you describe your current sex drive to be 1) unchanged, 2) reduced, 3) missing, 4) improved, 5) returned to normal. Between 2 and 3.

3a. If this is for a follow-up questionnaire, how has it changed since the last time you answered? i remain sexually unable to perform and am limited to masturbation.

4. Since the experience or last questionnaire (whichever is most recent), has your groin area experienced more sweat/humidity/dampness than usual?  No changes at ~3 years.

5. Has your ability to achieve spontaneous (non-physically stimulated) erections changed?   Please describe anything you may have noticed. - i remain unable to gain an erection without physical stimulation, or pharmaceutical assistance.

6. Since the experience or last questionnaire, has your flaccid/at-rest member (inside underwear & jeans/shorts) changed in sensitivity? i.e. - has it become more sensitive? or less, possibly like normal skin elsewhere on your body? or some combination of both?  - No changes since last questionnaire.  my penis sensitivity remains low.

7. Aside from any lingering physical symptoms from the experience, do you mentally 'feel' any different between your thighs than before?  As in neutral, something missing, void?  If so, explain:  - i am still very close to neutral most of the time.  Sometimes in the morning, when testosterone is at its highest, i may notice something more, and when i am on extended chastity.

8. Has your at-rest member become noticeably smaller/retracted/atrophied? and/or gained in size?  If changes have occurred, explain the most recent you have noticed.

- i remain the same as i have for much of the past three years - my package is smaller, and best attributed to the size of a male entering puberty.

9. Can you currently achieve a partial (thickening) or fairly/full erection at this time with physical stimulation?  - Yes, barely.

9a. If you can, what, if any, difference would you say there is in length and/or girth? - i remain unchanged in the past two years.  i can reach about 5" with varying levels of hardness, but generally less than it used to be. 

9b. Assuming there is a difference from before the experience, how does this change make you feel?  - Unable to engage in natural sexual activity with other women, and i am thereby lacking in interest to engage.

10. Since the experience, have you felt the need to masturbate more/unchanged/less often? (an explanation is encouraged if any change is noticed) - i continue to desire to edge and maturate, but biologically i am unable to produce enough fluids for more than 2 releases a week, with a few days between. 

11. Within the past ~2-4 weeks, have you been able to successfully achieve a release of sexual fluids?  No - i am currently in chastity for what is my 3rd week of ~5 weeks.

11a. If Yes, and if several times, about how often have you released in that period? N/A

11b. IF Yes, about how long is it until the urge to do so again returned? N/A

12. Assuming you have successfully released, and been able to observe it, have you noticed any changes in your ejaculate (quantity/contents/viscosity/mixture) since prior to the experience? It remains a poor subset of my former healthy ejaculate.  i produce less ejaculate per release, over a much-extended recovery period.

13. Have you felt any hot flashes? or woken up with night sweats?  or found it difficult at times to get warm/stay cool? Feeling warm after going to bed remains an initial challenge on many nights even though there are no changes in temperature in my dwelling.

13a. If yes, which of these? and about how frequently have they occurred? (in the past ~2-4 weeks) - Once or twice in a given week.

14. Have you needed to make any changes to your toilet routine when urinating or defecating?  None beyond taking care when sitting the direction of my urine stream

14a. If Yes, what do you find yourself doing differently?

15. Has your scrotum's size and/or it's average elasticity changed (less/more) since the experience? (an explanation is encouraged if any change has been noticed) - it has lost some of its stretch, and has visibly become smaller, having smaller internal components.

16. Has the contour/texture/feel of either of My testicles (inside the scrotum) changed in any way?  Aside from their size, please describe any changes noticed.

- None since last questionnaire, although visual comparisons to 2015 show they are notably smaller and no longer robust in their presence within my scrotum.

17. After any initial testicle swelling subsided from the experience, have you noticed any atrophy and/or regained mass in them since, and in any way?  

17a. If yes, what is your current size estimate (%) vs before their physical size before this experience?

- None since the last questionnaire or the experience subsided beyond noted volume observations.

18. Have you (or someone else) noticed any change in your emotional temperament? (the urge to cry, get irate, experience mood swings, etc).

18a. If so, which? and under what circumstances was it noticed?

- None that i know of.

19. Would you say that you have lost some/any strength or upper body muscle?

- Its likely possible, although COVID lifestyle and age are contributing factors.  i have less energy overall, and my strength and stamina are down.

20. Has your sexual pursuit of/interest in/interactions with the female sex changed in any way as a result of this experience?  Yes

20a. If Yes, explain what you feel is different: i no longer have a desire to pursue female partnership with a sexual component.  i am unable to contribute that component to a relationship if they desire adding it.

21. Have you gained any weight? or possibly gone up/down any clothing sizes (i.e. - around your waistline)?  If so, about how much?

- It seems possible, although COVID lifestyle and age are contributing factors.  i am probably 60 lbs heavier since the ~2018-2019-time frame.

22. Have you noticed any changes in facial hair growth or it's texture?

- None

23. Have you felt any difference in your male sexual identity?

23a. If Yes, please explain how it may have changed since the experience, and/or since the previous questionnaire.

- None since last questionnaire, but i remain sexually impotent.

24. Has any body hair (arms, legs, chest, back, etc) changed in any way?

- No changes

25. Has there been any sensitivity changes in your nipples, or breast texture?

- None noticed.

26. Assuming you are able to achieve sexual release (via masturbation, coitus, etc), please answer this section:

a. has the lead-up process/effort of reaching the point of climax changed for you in any way?  - Yes, since the experience, no change since last questionnaire.

a1. If Yes, how would you describe those changes? - A significant effort remains to get erect, and the approach to the plateau is difficult to enjoy/manage.

b. has the euphoric reward (afterglow) period changed for you in any way?  - Yes, since the experience, no change since last questionnaire.

b1. If Yes, what seems different now? - It remains much less rewarding than it used to be before and disappears quickly.

27. On a scale of 1-10, with 1 representing highest effort/lowest reward (i.e. - not worth it/unable to achieve), and 10 representing the lowest effort/highest reward (i.e. possibly from sometime before this experience), how would you rate your current climax effort/reward experience?  It remains in the 2-3 range.

28. Given an ideal situation to engage in sexual copulation right now, with an interested partner, how do you rate your chances of physically participating (as a male)?  Use the scale of 1=failure to 5=high success:  2, and only because i have a blue pill.  My only attempt in the past two years was a failure (without the pill).

29. Is there anything you might want to add as an additional comment or observation?  Please use the end of this questionnaire for this:

- i know You do not consider me castrated, but i continue to suffer the effects of my castration fantasy, and probably will for the rest of my life. 

Do not be surprised if I require you to fill out this questionnaire, or an updated version of it, again in the future.

#blonde bbw, #extreme cbt, #Everclear injections, #body modification, #medfet, #banding, #bdsm medical fetish, #medical cbt, #sub jason update, #castration, #tribander, #testicle banding, #judgment day

Current Measurements: sub jason.

These are the current, pre-judgment day measurements of My balls between sub jason's thighs. 

Left Testicle:

Dec 2020: 4.0cm x 3.5cm x 2.0cm -> 117.286
Jan 2021: 4.1cm x 3.5cm x 2.0cm -> 120.218
Feb 2021: 4.25cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 129.557
Mar 2021: 4.5cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 137.18 (old peak)
Dec 2021: 4.15cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 126.51
Aug 2022: 4.2cm x 3.3cm x 1.85cm -> 107.405
Sep 2022: 4.3cm x 3.4cm x 2.2cm -> 134.728
Dec 2022: 4.38cm x 3.37cm x 2.4cm -> 148.39 (new peak)

Right testicle:

Dec 2020: 4.4cm x 3.5cm x 2.4cm -> 141.916
Jan 2021: 4.45cm x 3.55cm x 2.5cm -> 165.431
Feb 2021: 4.45cm x 3.6cm x 2.5cm -> 167.761 (peak)
Mar 2021: 4.5cm x 3.5cm x 2.05cm -> 135.25
Dec 2021: 4.2cm x 3.45cm x 2.05cm -> 124.43
Aug 2022: 4.3cm x 3.2cm x 2.30cm -> 132.567
Sep 2022: 4.35cm x 3.25cm x 2.2cm -> 130.281
Dec 2022: 4.28cm x 3.17cm x 2.37cm -> 134.691

#blonde bbw, #extreme cbt, #Everclear injections, #body modification, #medfet, #banding, #bdsm medical fetish, #medical cbt, #sub jason update, #castration, #tribander, #testicle banding, #judgment day

Before & After: sub jason.

Before & After in sub jason's own words...

You modified the natural biological functions between my thighs. Without a functional tool for having sex, i feel like a fish out of water.  The details:

- Before: High libido

- After: Low/Lack of libido

- Before: Fully viable releases possible 2-3 times a day, with 3rd output sufficient if enough hydration; recovery possible by the next day.

- After: Semi-viable releases possible 1-2 times a week, content quality/quantity is low/questionable on the second if too soon, recovery several days.

- Before: strong erection, good quantity/quality and rewarding ejaculations, high confidence.

- After: dysfunctional erection, poor quality/quantity releases, performance anxiety, lack of confidence.

- Before: Spontaneous erections possible at any time.

- After: Spontaneous erections impossible.  Both physical stimulation and mental interest, or pharmaceutical enhancement, needed.

- Before: 6"+ length, firm, able to penetrate a pussy.

- After: 5"+ length, semi-firm, unable to penetrate a pussy. 

#extreme cbt, #Everclear injections, #body modification, #medfet, #banding, #bdsm medical fetish, #medical cbt, #sub jason update, #castration, #tribander, #testicle banding, #judgment day

After Effects: sub jason 2 years, 11 months.

 

In sub jason's own words...

Sub Jason Update - 2 years, 11 months

MsPatty has noted to me that many still follow this journey i have been on with Her.  To be fair, little has changed physically since She shared my last personal update in September.  For those new to reading this journey, there is plenty of week by week and month by month detail in the posted summary details on MsPatty's Medical Blog.  There are my first visits starting in December 2015, with events as far back as July 2019 being relevant to now.  She has also been asked what were my interests? and what were, and now, are MsPatty's goals?  All i can say about the future is that all of us are curious where this may end up, but none of it is written yet.  This is because MsPatty is quite simply A Woman.  There is no script involved.  Even if there were one, She could easily change Her mind at any point, and i know at times She has.

The well summarized version of the past ~3 years is that MsPatty caused my fantasy castration experience to transpire on the evening of December 26, 2019 after a 3+ month stretch of chastity.  She spread a thick castration band on Her tri-bander and closed it around the neck of my scrotum early that evening.  She then forced excess fluids out of 'Her boys' past the band with an acrylic press.  Around 30 minutes into the banding, She injected a total of 3cc Everclear, and removed the band after an hour had passed.  From the moment the band closed, my testosterone began falling.  As the hour progressed, both testicles shut down.  The static Everclear we now know took an additional toll.  The chastity high i walked in with was quickly forgotten, and my once-strong libido faded away during the overnight.  The effects of male menopause (i.e. castration symptoms) took hold over the next few days.  Both testicles quickly swelled to more than 2x, then atrophied to about 1/3 their original size a few weeks later.  i noticed a minor hint of a libido appear after about three months, and some testicle volume returned over the year or so that followed but has not returned to what it was.  Only a minor ~1-2% improvement in T-levels has been seen each year.  It is obvious now that significant damage transpired, and i will probably never know a normal libido again.

At some point during this past year or so, i queried MsPatty about the results She had been aiming for.  Her response was that She hoped for a temporary, yet possibly extended, period of no libido (i.e. a castration experience).  This implied something longer than the ~2-3 months which an hour banding (solo) might typically have produced, with late spring 2020 or the summer more likely for my general recovery.  She had also noticed my fairly high (unmeasured but perceived) testosterone level over many prior visits.  She had hoped for a slight drop in that (i.e. some damage).  As noted in the frequent testing since, i have yet to reach even the low edge of normal testosterone levels.  Both of 'Her boys' are comparatively smaller now.  i remain limp without external physical stimulation or pharmaceutical enhancement, and even those physical effects are off from what i once achieved.  my libido is a mere shadow of what it once was, and at times barely perceivable.  MsPatty knows She far exceeded Her expectations, and this thrills the part of Her which craves needing to control.

MsPatty has been asked a number of times if this was what i wanted.  The question in effect being, did i, "no longer want be able to have normal heterosexual relations with women?"  As far as something permanent was concerned, the answer to that is no.  There was a fantasy involved, implying only a temporary experience.  i had an expectation that at some point i would have recovered much of my libido as it was before.  At the same time, i knew there were risks involved.  Some of them have contributed to what has since transpired, and i have to accept them.

MsPatty reminds me often that, while i am not truly castrated, the resulting impotence/sexual dysfunction from low testosterone does not bother Her.  She believes She has helped 'Her boys' to server a higher purpose (Her).  This has now become part of my extended journey with MsPatty.  She gets off on my ongoing struggles with a low to non-existent libido, and my inability to perform sexually.  Since the pandemic has eased, i know i have missed several opportunities to have sex with interested ladies of my age - all because of what has transpired.  From this, MsPatty knows She controls what remains of my sexual future and has effectively left Her permanent mark inside of me.  

#extreme cbt, #Everclear injections, #body modification, #medfet, #banding, #bdsm medical fetish, #medical cbt, #sub jason update, #castration, #tribander, #testicle banding, #judgment day

September Measurements: sub jason.

These are the last measurements of My balls between sub jason's thighs. As you can see, the variations are most likely natural fluctuations at this point. They will be measured again soon before Judgment Day 2022. 

Left Testicle:

Dec 2020: 4.0cm x 3.5cm x 2.0cm -> 117.286

Jan 2021: 4.1cm x 3.5cm x 2.0cm -> 120.218

Feb 2021: 4.25cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 129.557

Mar 2021: 4.5cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 137.18 (peak)

Dec 2021: 4.15cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 126.51

Aug 2022: 4.2cm x 3.3cm x 1.85cm -> 107.405

Sep 2022: 4.3cm x 3.4cm x 2.2cm -> 134.728

Right testicle:

Dec 2020: 4.4cm x 3.5cm x 2.4cm -> 141.916

Jan 2021: 4.45cm x 3.55cm x 2.5cm -> 165.431

Feb 2021: 4.45cm x 3.6cm x 2.5cm -> 167.761 (peak)

Mar 2021: 4.5cm x 3.5cm x 2.05cm -> 135.25

Dec 2021: 4.2cm x 3.45cm x 2.05cm -> 124.43

Aug 2022: 4.3cm x 3.2cm x 2.30cm -> 132.567

Sep 2022: 4.35cm x 3.25cm x 2.2cm -> 130.281

Latest Update:

December 2022 Online Schedule

Medical Fetish Video Gallery

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2011 - 2018

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2006 - 2010

LeatherRealm: Photo Gallery 

#blonde bbw, #extreme cbt, #Everclear injections, #body modification, #medfet, #banding, #bdsm medical fetish, #medical cbt, #sub jason update, #castration, #tribander, #testicle banding, #judgment day

Judgment Day 2022 Countdown: sub jason...

On December 26th, 2019, I injected Everclear into each of My testicles between sub jason's thighs, 30 minutes into an hour-long banding.  I chose to allow him to keep My balls for another year but with a reminder that has lasted since then.

Once again on December 31st, 2022, I will be making My choice whether to allow him to keep My balls for another year or to take them this time. On Twitter, I am posting surveys, videos and pictures from the last almost 3 years. Be a part of My decision this year, share them and possibly be a part of this life changing event. 

 Latest Update:

November - December 2022 Online Schedule

Medical Fetish Video Gallery

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2011 - 2018

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2006 - 2010

LeatherRealm: Photo Gallery 

#blonde bbw, #extreme cbt, #Everclear injections, #body modification, #medfet, #banding, #bdsm medical fetish, #medical cbt, #sub jason update, #castration, #tribander, #testicle banding, #judgment day

After Effects: sub jason; 2 years & 9 months (~1000 days)

 

In sub jason's own words...

Since MsPatty shared my last personal update, there have been few observed changes.  my sensitivity to physical stimulation down below remains low.  In the early morning, when testosterone peaks, my ability to physically stimulate an erection is slightly easier, but nothing to celebrate.  Spontaneous erections from mental arousal alone remains elusive.  An erection, without maintaining physical stimulation, and my mental attention, quickly deflates.  Using a ring at the base sometimes helps maintain it a little, but it's not reliable.  my best erection today remains 1" shorter than it used to be, and always less firm.  i continue to experience difficulties in maintaining a comfortable body temperature, particularly during the overnight.  i have noted an overall reduction in personal energy and motivation for doing physical activities.

During my first visit in December 2015, 6-3/4 years ago, MsPatty confirmed my interest in Fantasy Castration.  Years later, She would reveal that by the end of that visit, She had decided on two goals.  1) She would one day leave Her mark on me, and 2) She would one day lead me to experience the symptoms of castration.  Four years later, She achieved both, and exceed her expectations on the latter.  Her achievement has permanently deprived me of my (formerly) strong libido.  Most of the sexual activities i once enjoyed i can no longer pursue.  MsPatty is not bothered by this significant outcome.  She claims this is Her way of reminding me of 'the male slut i used to be', regardless of my attempts to argue otherwise.  She highlights all of the poor choices i made over the past ~35 years.  Among them, She points to the many partners i had, and my multiple attempts with each, failing to impregnate any of them, even with my rare use of condoms.  MsPatty frequently reminds me She has (so far) allowed me to 'keep Her boys between my thighs', but in a greatly reduced functional state.

Between my thighs, it no longer feels like a strong and stable platform for engaging in sexual activity - it sometimes feels completely absent in the day or so after a release.  The urge to masturbate strikes once, or maybe twice, a week.  It used to occur most mornings and occasionally in the afternoon or evening.  To gain an erection, i have to continually stimulate myself by hand, mentally focusing on staying hard, and on what MsPatty has done there, instead of (previously) trying to enjoy the journey up the orgasmic incline with a random partner (real or fantasy) and ride the euphoric edge as long as possible.  my delivery process now has fewer pulses, each are weaker, and the thinner mixture is quickly exhausted.  It seems to take more energy from me to achieve, and the euphoria from it quickly fades.

Biologically, 3+ days must pass after a previous release before my body replenishes enough fluids for another reasonable discharge.  my output, when waiting less time, is drizzly, or merely a small squirt.  The overall quality, once copious and thick, is a thinner liquid with some thicker globs.  This implies lower overall sperm production, and lacking in other components in the mix.  i was once capable of ~2-3 viable releases a day, but like many of the vivid memories i had from past encounters, both have faded out of reach.  my only attempt at having penetrative sex since MsPatty's modifications was last year.  i attempted entering several times, with my most recent partner, after physically stroking myself to an erection, but quickly became too limp each time.  The last time i had successful sexual intercourse was with them ~5 years ago.  MsPatty has made it harder for me to reach an orgasm, made it less enjoyable once getting there, and made what i produce less viable - if it can ever be delivered on target again.

MsPatty has since graciously offered me a pill which can provide an erection for a short time.  The criteria for its use, and the delay before its effects show, make spontaneous use nearly impossible, and planned use difficult.  First, i must vet any possible partner with MsPatty.  The pill, taken orally, takes about 30 minutes to take effect.  It provides only about 30 minutes of useful stiffness, with no improvement in sensitivity.  i am only to take the pill if i am sure i am going to enter my partner's pussy - i cannot waste it on speculation or other activities.  Soon after, i am required to describe, in detail, the entire encounter to MsPatty.  i know my efforts must also please MsPatty in what i do, or i may not be granted another pill.  This leaves little overall time to just enjoy.  Other factors include 1) i am insecure, not knowing if i can reach a climax from just penetration stimulation - i am convinced a condom would make it all but impossible to feel anything, 2) my partners are relatively vanilla, and an explanation of where my issues come from are hardly pillow talk, and 3) i would have nothing left in my tank if a 'second effort' was called for.  MsPatty, of course, suggests i should, "...not concern myself with my little problems <wicker giggle>, just please your partner."

All of my frustration is directly attributed to low testosterone.  Prior to MsPatty’s modifications, each testicle would have functioned at ~50% (with a 50% reserve).  One fully healthy organ could still provide normal levels of testosterone, sperm, and generation of other related fluids.  From the most recent T-test, my level only improved a few percent closer to the low/normal line.  The function/output of each of 'her boys' is estimated at only 15-20%, with no reserve.  MsPatty has effectively reduced my testosterone level to ~1/3 of a normal male.   Only a very small improvement in T level has been gradually seen over the last 2+ years.  It seems unlikely that i will attain even 1/2 of my former level.  This also assumes MsPatty does not make further modifications.

MsPatty remains thrilled by my ongoing struggle from Her leaving Her eternal mark inside me.  She recently passed along a question from several: Was this something i wanted (permanently)? or expected to happen?  The simple answer is no, it is/was not, but how it transpired is not so clear cut.  i chose to accept certain risks, and there were also added unknowns which i allowed to contribute.  The result has become my unique journey with MsPatty, and i must live with it.  From this, MsPatty happily reminds me of the pride She feels having modified my sexual responses.  From this, She knows She will always control my sexual future.

---

Now for My own words...My balls between sub jason's thighs will be up for My judgement again at the end of the year. Will they remain as they are, or will I finally kill them permanently? Time will only tell. <wicked grin> 

To view all My posts here on LeatherRealm talking about sub jason's journey, go to LeatherRealm: sub jason.

 Latest Update:

September - December 2022 Online Schedule

Medical Fetish Video Gallery

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2011 - 2018

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2006 - 2010

LeatherRealm: Photo Gallery 

#castratix #castration, #extreme cbt, #Everclear injections, #body modification, #medfet, #banding, #bdsm medical fetish, #medical cbt, #sub jason update

Current Measurements: sub jason.

 

Current measurements of My balls between sub jason's thighs. As you can see from the measurements below that it's been since last December 2021 that I've posted a measurement update. Since Judgement Day 2022 is in roughly 4 months, I will be posting measurements more often. 

Left Testicle:

Dec 2020: 4.0cm x 3.5cm x 2.0cm -> 117.286

Jan 2021: 4.1cm x 3.5cm x 2.0cm -> 120.218

Feb 2021: 4.25cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 129.557

Mar 2021: 4.5cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 137.18 (peak)

Dec 2021: 4.15cm x 3.55cm x 2.05cm -> 126.51

*Aug 2022: 4.2cm x 3.3cm x 1.85cm -> 107.405

Right testicle:

Dec 2020: 4.4cm x 3.5cm x 2.4cm -> 141.916

Jan 2021: 4.45cm x 3.55cm x 2.5cm -> 165.431

Feb 2021: 4.45cm x 3.6cm x 2.5cm -> 167.761 (peak)

Mar 2021: 4.5cm x 3.5cm x 2.05cm -> 135.25

Dec 2021: 4.2cm x 3.45cm x 2.05cm -> 124.43

*Aug 2022: 4.3cm x 3.2cm x 2.30cm -> 132.567

 Latest Update:

August - December 2022 Online Schedule

Medical Fetish Video Gallery

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2011 - 2018

Medical & Body Fetish Journal 2006 - 2010

LeatherRealm: Photo Gallery 

#medfet, #bdsm medical fetish, #cbt #leatherrealm, #ohio mistress, #nurse fetish, #needles, #castration, #sub jason update, #everclear, #testicle banding, #emasculater, #castratrix

Castration Fantasy into Reality: sub jason.

Inspired by MsPatty's words, ghost written by sub jason.

(Circa Late 2015)

I want you to know I am excited that W/we share an interest in your fantasy of experiencing castration.  From My past experience, each fantasy can and usually does unfold in a different way.  I can already tell this will be an exciting and unique journey.  Therefore, I am confident that one day you will get to experience the effects of castration. <evil chuckle>

----------------------

Over the many visits you will make over the upcoming years, this journey will brush upon several different methods of castration.  During each encounter, I will be picking through your mind, exploring your physical and emotional responses, and gauging your tolerance.  I encourage you to continue to research the various non-surgical methods of castration.  Even if some methods are not realistically possible, tell me about the ones which interest you.  They help Me to understand where your mind is, and where it is going.  I encourage you to begin to write your own fantasy stories, and I will want to read them.

----------------------

As part of the journey, you can expect Me to give you certain activities or restrictions in advance which help Me and help to prepare you.  For example, you will shave your groin area well just before our times together.  During times when we are not meeting, you will inform me about any sexual interactions, or kink activities you may otherwise engage in.  If I have any questions, you will respond with honestly.  You will also not ejaculate for at least a week prior to visiting Me.  In time, you will offer to abstain from releasing even longer for Me.

----------------------

Over the course of these shared experiences, I value your feedback - down to even the minor details.  You will begin tracking your thoughts and activities and keep them as a log.  I will also encourage you to explore and share your childhood memories, and your sexual past, as they tend to pop up and grant me additional insight into your mind.  You will try to explain to Me any connections which you think can be made with your current interests.  When a suitable interval is reached, you will copy them into an e-mail, and send the latest entries to Me.  I love to know the path which has led My balls between your thighs back home to Me.

----------------------

While I do not cater to specific requests unless it interests Me, I will want to know what you are thinking leading up to a visit.  You will keep me updated about any pain or discomfort you feel after a visit.  Don't worry, from time to time you will take home lingering reminders <evil chuckle>.  You will explain what you are feeling & notice, describing any healing time afterward.  You will also provide Me feedback on other shared interests that are explored during these meetings.  

----------------------

(Spring 2016)

In the months after meeting for the first time, you took an interest in the CaCl injections experienced by another.  The goal on that journey was for chemical castration.  This topic is obviously a soft spot in your mind.  I will be pressing on it next time, and many more after that.

----------------------

(Summer 2016)

Nearly all of my castration fantasy interests have heard of, or read about on my blog, a Burdizzo.  Few know how painful the experience is until I have their cords crimped firmly between the jaws of my tool; but you will soon feel its unrelenting grip.  It is around this time that I prefer to establish ownership of My balls between your thighs.  While clamping the spermatic cords to full castration is not for most, partial clamping has an incredible impact.  The pain of this partial (fantasy) clamping helps illuminate how fragile your connection to My balls is.  This pain is quite useful to help Me begin to separate your mind and your sexual identity from My balls.

----------------------

(Fall 2016)

I will continue infusing your scrotum with more saline each time, so you will begin stretching it at regular intervals.  You will obtain one or more items to assist in that effort.  I will encourage you to stretch for longer, more often, along with greater weight for short periods, when leading up to each visit.

----------------------

(Winter 2016-Spring 2017)

You will try to anticipate what may or may not be in store for an upcoming visit.  What I say, and what I write, will be geared toward that next experience, or possibly a later one.  I will skip over some topics you may ask about as they may or may not apply to what I currently have in mind.  In any case, I know it benefits Me for your mind to consider My lack of an answer.  At other times, I will tell you some portion of what is going to happen so your mind gets pulled down the rabbit hole to consider even deeper consequences.  I adore both the long and the subtle mind fuck.

----------------------

(Winter 2017-Spring 2018)

After 2 years, My balls have done well, handling compression, skewering, and electro in stride, although your cords still remember the press of my Burdizzo.  They have also handled infusions of both saline and Everclear.  My balls between your thighs are a hearty pair with fairly high output and good natural resiliency.  Nevertheless, my Everclear infusion dimmed your libido for several months before recovering, and it took you some time to realize it.  This means one of My ball's control points has quietly been identified, and you will come to realize how much I crave that control.  I have much more fun planned for them in other ways, too.  I have not forgotten about your first fantasy story you shared some time ago, either.

---------------------- 

(Spring 2019)

After 3 years of visits, you will become curious about entering extended chastity periods for Me from My posting of this activity with others.  I will encourage it, of course.  Chastity serves Me as you hand over more control.  Chastity also restricts you from playing with My property and carelessly spilling My boys' seed.

----------------------

(Summer 2019)

I was thrilled by your positive reaction to My ball's first banding for 30 minutes.  It also put a great smile on my face when I forced you to ejaculate while banded, and you were thinking it was your last.  I could tell I led your mind smoothly across a very special line as you granted Me full control of your sexual future.  You won't know when, but banding will be a significant part of how I will lead you to experience the effects of castration <wicked giggle>.

---------------------- 

(Fall 2019)

My surprise banding didn't work out as expected, but the knowledge you gained of what almost happened, and what I have planned for next time, is mind-blowing, isn't it?  You are excited about doing better to prepare, to remain banded for the entire duration, and very curious about what the experience entails.  By banding My balls for an hour, I will take away your libido, but you have no idea yet what it will feel like.  You have always been one with your sexual essence since puberty.  Soon you will experience what it was like to be without it.  In the buzz of the moment, you even granted Me an opportunity to inject My balls with something other than inert saline.  Never one to refrain from a challenge, or a good mind fuck, you can try to guess what I have in mind... I can smell My victory already.

----------------------

(December 26, 2019 / The Day Of):

- You arrive hydrated and prepared for the enema you will be given soon after you arrive.

- Once in My space, I restrain you, legs suspended high, and spread, so I have access to My balls.

- My band closes over your scrotum's neck with a snap, and my timer starts.

- My acrylic press forces My balls' excess fluids past the band, lowering internal fluid pressure.

- My electro helps distract you from the passage of time.

- I inject each of My balls with 2cc of Everclear at 30 minutes.  They will remember me forever.

- As the pain from the band escalates, I keep you distracted until the timer is up.

- I cut My band after 1hr, your body shudders, and My panties are wet.  

- I smile knowing that I have left My mark inside My balls, and your sexual future forever changed.

--------------------------

(Soon After And The Next Morning)

The one-hour banding experience by itself is intense.  You wonder for a bit what has actually occurred.  A few details will eventually become clear:

- Both of My balls, deprived of oxygenated blood for an extended period, are in shock, and have shut down.

- Sperm maturation and testosterone production, a cycle which extends over ~64-72 days, has been aborted.

- Just like a castrated male, testosterone is no longer entering your bloodstream from its primary source.

- You have already forgotten about the 3+ month chastity edge you walked in with.

- Just like a castrated male, your blood testosterone level declines, soon reaching a negligible level.

- For the night ahead, I enjoy filling your scrotum full with saline, and playing with it, and your mind.

- The next morning, I force you to ejaculate a little thick sludge - all that remains in you.  Despite an intense effort on your part to emit it, this is only a hint of the struggle which is to come.

You will next encounter the symptoms of testosterone loss.  You will send Me updates on everything you experience.  

--------------------------

(The Next Few Days)

After experiencing your first day of your fantasy castration journey, these symptoms are right around the corner:

- Both of My balls inside that scrotum will swell unnaturally to 2-3 times their normal size as your body rushes nearby fluids to address their internal damage.

- As in times past, your significantly infused scrotum will take several days to dissipate.

- The pain and swelling you feel in your cords and groin area from the banding and ejaculating while everything was greatly inflamed will linger for about a week, and then begin to subside.

- Your ability to experience spontaneous erections has already faded, and generating them from manual stimulation is already in decline.

- Lacking testosterone, your body will produce less secondary sexual resources (i.e., ejaculate fluids), and what ejaculate you produce will thin out from a lack of newly matured sperm.

- You will soon find it difficult to reach and control a climax/release, despite a reoccurring itch to experience it more often.

You are now experiencing what a male encounters soon after his testicles are removed (castration).

--------------------------

As My balls' swelling subsides over the next ~2 weeks, you will begin to notice some additional effects.  They are all likely to linger for quite awhile:

- My nuts will atrophy, becoming firm and bumpy, shrinking to less than 1/2 of their normal size.

- you will feel like something is missing - your groin area will feel like a void, and the area will frequently feel damp.

- your cock will noticeably retract/shrink, and its sensitivity will diminish to that of normal skin.

- Your interest in the opposite sex will fade away.

- Any weak erection you can produce will take focused manual effort, and be difficult to maintain.

- Any releases you achieve will have chronically low fluid output, requiring many days in between attempts to emit more than dribbles.

- You will begin to feel the common effects of hormonal menopause, just like a woman would:

-> random hot/cold flashes

-> night sweats

-> difficulty managing a comfortable body temperature

You will notice that strong physical activity may bring about menopausal symptoms more frequently.  Over an extended time, your body will acclimate to any hormonal changes.

You will continue updating Me with what you are experiencing and thinking.  You will confirm each of these symptoms as you encounter them.

---------------------------

(Spring 2020)

you begin to notice some small amount of recovery, offering a glimmer of hope.  The still-viable areas in each of My nuts have restarted their normal processes.  However, My nuts are much smaller now, and their functional output greatly reduced.  You have entered the next phase of recovery.  I will encourage you to be patient.  This recovery will be slow since I injected Everclear, and will seem to go on for a long time.

---------------------------

(Summer 2020)

you begin feeling as if your healing has slowed.  Also, your frustration with being sexually impotent is growing.  I remind you that it does not concern me at all that you struggle at being limp and unable to sexually perform.  In fact, I find it quite amusing.  My nuts no longer function for you as they once did, and instead, they function only for My pleasure.  you will begin to think that those natural sexual activities you once desired and pursued will no longer be achievable.  

---------------------------

(Fall 2020)

A full testosterone test result reveals your level remains quite a bit below normal.  I will remind you to think about all that testosterone My nuts between your thighs once produced; the strength it used to give your now dysfunctional cock; the firm anchor of pride which once warmed your loins; it was undeniably what led you, and My boys, to Me, all those years ago.  Isn't it amazing how My balls testosterone influences you, for good or bad? <wicked giggle>

---------------------------

(Winter-Spring 2021)

Knowing that you continue to struggle every day with the effects of low testosterone brings a smile to my face.  While you are not technically castrated, My nuts between your thighs now function differently, and only for Me.  I am constantly thrilled that I have significantly changed your sexual future by taking control.  you will have difficulty accepting this.  The effect I have had on my nuts, and thereby you, cannot be denied.  You will eventually accept that you are borrowing the use of My nuts between your thighs.  It will be determined on a year to year basis whether you may continue using them.

---------------------------

(2022 & Onward)

For the foreseeable future, you can look forward to both incremental improvements and undeniable realities:

- Your body will continue to rebuild My nuts, but they have suffered permanent internal damage, so their output will never be equal to what you once knew.

- Your testosterone level will remain below normal for some time.  It will eventually rise, in small amounts, over an extended period, but the strong libido you once had is unlikely to return.

- Many of your past sexual memories will begin to fade as your mind gets used to much less testosterone, and those memories no longer trigger.

- Orgasms will never be as rewarding, or carry the extended euphoric rewards, as you once knew.

- Having been quite proud of your former 6" penis, then experienced its atrophy and ongoing erectile dysfunction, you will continually struggle to regain your sexual confidence.

- If you ever again succeed at penetrative sex with another woman, it will seem more of a chore, and less of a reward, than you have always remembered.

Each yearly anniversary I will revisit my lease for you to use My boys.  The question will always be: Will I take them this time?  Craving their past experiences, My boys will drive you to play My game, and you will not hesitate to follow.  The first few times will seem to be left to chance; with all the various castration methods possibly being next.  I know that keeping them will be a double-sided tease, leaving you to suffer with low testosterone for another year, but maybe you can eventually get hard for a little while from a little pill?  At any point I may again band My boys; possibly, taking away what's left of your libido for several months? Or maybe longer?  The question will always be there: Will My boys wake up again? Can your weak libido return?  Then if it returns, how many times do My boys have left at the edge? <evil giggle>

---------------------------

I will remind you often that I like to regularly relive every detail of this journey.  Each time I do, I quickly get wet and easily gush with an intense orgasm.  I know you will be continually reminded of your experience, and what has changed, many times each and every day.  you will be unable to deny that I have turned your castration fantasy experience into your reality.  <evil chuckle>