Sunday, March 28, 2021

After Effects: sub jason 15 month update...


sub jason’s 15 Month Summary Update

In the period before each visit to MsPatty, She would have me do lead-up chastity, and months of scrotum stretching.  i would be instructed to wear the weight/spacer rings for several hours each day.  i would easily get spontaneously hard during that time with the constant tug between my thighs, but never permitted a release.  i was also to use a parachute a few times a week, with several lbs attached for a shorter period of time.  By the fall of 2019, the chastity lead up period had reached 3+ months.  The stretching was sufficient that MsPatty had successfully infused 2000cc or similar amounts earlier in the year.  i also had not had sex in over 2 years at that point.  MsPatty knew She had me well on edge as the December 2019 visit approached.

As verbally promised the November prior, MsPatty’s hour banding in December had quickly shut down Her testicles between my thighs.  Within hours, as my testosterone levels fell, 3+ months of chastity’s hormonal edge faded, and the early symptoms of castration would appear by the next morning.  Her surprise needles of Everclear are now known to have had a devastating internal effect.  Some permanent damage seems apparent, producing in this long and frustrating recovery.  Measurable healing gains are now difficult to identify, implying it has slowed or stopped.  Although testicle volume has steadily improved, they remain smaller, firmer, and less functional.  As one year passed, my overall testosterone level was much lower than most healthy males.  Considering the amount of time which has passed, my hopes for a full recovery have faded.  i had speculative hope for an 80% recovery one year ago.  Even that now seems unlikely.  Some significant level of permanent sexual dysfunction seems inevitable.

Since MsPatty’s modifications that December 2019 evening, the weight rings and parachute openings are now too large, and they eventually slip off.  The spontaneous erections from lead up chastity no longer happen.  The erections made possible from manual stimulation and best effort are reduced, about ~1" less and some loss of girth.  Explaining my struggle for release control, recovery, and it's quantity/quality is complex because they are all related.  The simplest version is that an average release from manual stimulation is possible after about a week of abstinence.  i have no viable capacity for 'round two' immediately after.  With the poor erections/high maintenance effort to stay hard comes very weak release control.  The overall zone where penis and scrotum connect to my torso are at times slightly sunken/atrophied when compared to memories and pictures from prior.  The scrotum has retained much of the stretch achieved despite no stretching since just before that visit.  

What began over 5 years ago as a journey exploring castration fantasy has become much more.  MsPatty has told me that Her modifications to Her testicles between my thighs on December 26, 2019, have instead greatly exceeded Her expectations.  She said last July that She sheds no tears over the dramatic blow my libido has taken, nor the resulting erectile dysfunction.  In hindsight, i departed Her space the next morning a castrate male possessing only my memories of sex from 35+ years before.  my reports of frustration and struggle since continue to entertain Her dreams and fantasies.   Another full testosterone test will be sent off during my next visit to MsPatty.  It has been 15 months since i knew a strong libido, and the sexual rewards it once brought me.

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